When it doesn’t really matter whether changing
the past was ever a real thing, you’ve got to focus on this more or less expected
time of year, which turns out to be all about jugglingPexmas parties and slow-cooked death and retarded cookies and tarots,
present shopping and present giving and present receiving, cake receiving and
coffee receiving, and sharing, photo boothing, hair cutting and more or less
extensive hair dying (yet, no flamboyaging), mulled whining and vintage weighing and recipe improvising, for cake giving;
and if you stopped for half a second and looked in the mirror between each ing (or, if you were to spend four hours
at the hairdresser’s sat in front of one of said mirrors), you would be
astounded to find you could well be a red-haired modern-day version of Anna Karerinina because you’re smiley like that
(and only worryingly less photogenic); but then again, why would you stop for
even half a second, when the cross that you bear is half as heavy as you run
around pushed by the cold wind, and amazing ventures and adventures await, and
there’s the new best Engl-alian cake setting
in the fridge, ready to be shared like your own special version of gold or
frankincense or myrrh, except it’s made of Italian chocolate and English tea biscuits
and a bucketload of Canadian marshmallows because you’ve got to make the most
of what you’ve got, to wake that winter sun at last.
ROCKY ROAD SALAMI
200g (7oz) rich tea-type biscuits, crushed
100g (3/4 cup) icing sugar
40g (1/4 cup + 1 tablespoon) cocoa powder
30g (1/4 cup + 1 tablespoon) ground almonds
75g (1 cup) dark chocolate, chopped
120g (1/2 cup) margarine
70g (2.5oz) vegan mini marshmallows
In a mixing bowl combine crushed biscuits,
icing sugar, cocoa powder and ground almonds. In the meantime melt the
chocolate in a double boiler.
Add margarine and melted chocolate into the
bowl with the other ingredients, stirring to combine, then fold in the
marshmallows. Mix with your hands until you get a smooth mixture then shape it
into a sausage and roll it in extra icing sugar. Wrap in foil or parchment
paper and place in the fridge for about 4 hours.
Cut into slices and eat and Merry Pexmas.